One drunken New Year's Eve I was celebrating with friends in South Philly. All the houses kind of looked the same in the neighborhood, and no one locked their doors back then. In a drunken stupor, I apparently entered the wrong house and passed out on the couch. I woke up the next morning and saw the newspaper. I started reading it, with my feet up on the couch. Soon, some old guy I had never seen before came down the stairs and said "who the fuck are you?"

I had a lot of explaining to do.