avoidance
the way to want me is not to want me expectations scare me and the more you anticipate the less you’ll getfor i am not safe in securing my wants and any external desire will shut me downmanaging expectations is a novel concept to me how can i manage pain that can easily be avoidedbetter we meet at random or with an excuse drunk i forget myself for wanting youcause i continuously play and perform i cannot act on true heart's desirei am utterly worthless charitize me to strangers at my lover’s disgust who believes i’m special