I recently wrote a reply to a similar (same?) question about Monero here: https://stasher.news/items/338537/r/AilliA?commentId=338565 and I'm not a Bitcoin OG - I arrived too late to this world for that :))

I’ll quote the relevant parts:

• Bisq (https://x.com/bisq_network, https://bisq.network): BTC/XMR over Tor + multisig. Platform fees + security deposit and on-chain fees.
• RetoSwap (https://x.com/RetoSwap, https://retoswap.com): https://haveno.exchange/ is the Monero-native Bisq fork. Same model as Bisq, Monero at the core, Tor.
• Private XmrBazaar seller (https://x.com/xmragora, https://xmrbazaar.com/search-category/buy-exchange/other/): use ONLY with multisig escrow or a bonded user. ALWAYS. (I try to weed out suspicious offers proactively, but better safe than sorry.)

Avoid:

• Private / local meetup cash trades work ONLY if you already know people: random unescrowed "meet at the park" from a random listing is what I’d 100% avoid.
• Most Bitcoin ATMs: cameras(!), shrinking no-ID limits, high fees, and a growing paper trail.
• Unescrowed cash-by-mail with a no-rep seller.
• Gift-card / "I send you a code", e.g. I do not mediate gift card transactions (and it's in my terms https://xmrbazaar.com/mediator-listing/Mhj9z/!) "because it is impossible to determine the cause of disputes when a buyer claims a card is empty or the code is invalid".