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It can be amazing how selfish and dismissive relatives can be, especially older ones who think they know better because they survived whatever of 1940-whatever. While we assume common sense, a lot of family members can be downright arses when inconvenienced.
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let's just say both sides can be excessive
overly selfish and uncaring about the safety of others on one side
overly paranoid and demanding of others on the other side
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All true. Humans are amazingly versatile at being knuckleheads in 1000s of ways.
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That’s a bit excessive then. Most people are smart enough to use good judgement and if they are sick not go visit a baby. Or at very least not handle the baby.