Yes, that’s right—I’ve cursed, dirty-joked, shit-talked, and drank my way into occupying at least some small sliver of iconoclastic space in the financial world. As I’ve said many times, I’m not even sure I can affect change, so I’m just happy to sit back and watch this experiment in monetary policy and human psychology play out.

It’s like the Jerry Springer Show for finance—the best kind of reality TV you can get.

Neel Kashkari arbitrates monetary policy debate between FOMC members Which is why, given my background, I’ve surprised even myself these last few weeks with how alarmed and disgusted I’ve been over the rise of financial products like the aptly named "Fartcoin"—a cryptocurrency that is assuredly worth zero dollars, has zero practical use, and is as noxious and empty as its name suggests.

But in today’s market, Fartcoin has skyrocketed to a market capitalization of near $1.3 billion. To put this into perspective, Fartcoin is now worth more than around 1,000 companies in the Russell 3000 Index, — companies with products and services, many of which are generating cash, others that are on a path to generating cash.

Fartcoin’s ascent (literally can’t believe I’m typing those words), marked by a 2,940% return since November 2024, dwarfs gains in almost all other assets — the risk averse and the risky. Since November 4, 2024, the S&P 500 has risen approximately 5.7%, while long-term Treasury bonds, oil, and gold have experienced slight declines.