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Never try to pay an invoice twice, (especially not while a payment is pending) else nodes can and will steal from you (= tell you they’ve successfully forwarded the payment but they didn’t). That was the mistake. That your private node used the same routes as your other node was just the icing on the cake. But sounds like you didn’t lose any funds except to mining fees.
wow, i did get very lucky there. This may go to top of list of 'brutal realities of self-custodial lightning'
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