Recently, one of our community members sent in a question:
“I went through some really hard times in the past. I'm trying to be resilient and move on, but no matter what I do, it still feels hard. How can I move on?"
This question can help us to deconstruct one of the Old Happy myths about resilience.
Our society tells us that in order to be resilient, you can't feel pain or struggle. You have to be strong. You have to move on. You have to find the silver lining, immediately.
But we know from research that this is not true. People who are resilient accept and honor their emotions. They speak up when they're hurt. They reflect on what happened. They ask for help when they need it.
Feeling your emotions is not just part of being resilient — it's a critical element of it. The next time you're struggling with something, know that you don't need to rush your way through your feelings. Honoring and experiencing them is an important part of the healing process.