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I heard the word "sex" from a series I was watching with my husband and she came over the moment the word was said. The first time she asked I played deaf and changed the topic of conversation, I think that's where I made my first mistake, several days went by and for the second time she asked the question again, my husband told her it's to classify "female and male sex", that's when her curiosity went away. Today she's asking me again, I'm in a meltdown, I'm a first-time mom. At 7 years old can they already know what sex is? What can I answer?
She knows that it is not a stork that brings babies, she knows that it takes a man and a woman to create life, but she does not know what the process is. I told her that a baby is created from the love of the parents.
But now I don't think it's appropriate to tell him that sex is the way to create babies, much less tell him that it's a recreational activity.
Uh oh. This means I only have a couple of years before I need to deal with this dilemma. Our daughter has always struggled with the difference between boys and girls, since it makes such little difference at her age. She's often pointing at women and saying "Look at that guy!" She's also very loud.
I would probably say "It's how babies are made. We can talk about it more when you're older."
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I agree. Keep it simple. and let them know that there are some parts that aren't for young kids to consider.
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90 sats \ 3 replies \ @grayruby 18h
Haha look at that guy!
Tell her it’s ok it’s 2024 none of us know who is a boy and who is a girl.
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We wanted to give her an answer that she could actually use (as opposed to the real difference), so we told her that boys have short hair and girls have long hair (It's true for the kids in her preschool). You can imagine the many problems and confusions that has caused since.
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51 sats \ 0 replies \ @grayruby 18h
This is why I am pro gender specific clothes and colours. Makes things much easier.
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Oh, it can't be, I can't stop laughing, there are too many funny things to experience with children. One small communication error is enough and it becomes crazy.
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I'm laughing at what you're saying "look at a guy". It reminded me of my daughter when she was 4 years old and asked her teacher "teacher, do you have a penis or a vagina?" in the middle of an online class.
I'm thinking of giving you a correct answer
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Even if you give her the birds and bees speech, she won’t understand and eventually get bored and move on
Add: I remember watching one episode of Cheers as a preteen and realized later as a teenager I missed all the punchlines
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Tell her that It’s just what happens when adults forget to turn off the lights, close the door and suddenly think ‘Damn! how did that happen?’ Stick to your Legos for now! Just kidding, by the way. Be very careful what you tell her because kids are unpredictable. It would be embarrassing if you're in a busy restaurant and she shouts, 'Mommy, what's sex?' So, answer her every question don't avoid it because kids are curious and smart.
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10 sats \ 1 reply \ @bief57 OP 18h
Hahaha, what a laugh, first of all. You have to be very tactful when answering. Today at home I shouted SEX and he started laughing, I told him that he couldn't say words that he didn't know the meaning of and well, that's where the questions start, I'm in a state of disarray trying to give him an age-appropriate answer.
Thanks!!
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You're welcome! May the teaching force be with you!
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It's how you got here, kiddo. Adults have sex to make people and because it feels good. It's only for adults who have a job, car, house, 1 BTC etc.
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1 sat \ 0 replies \ @OT 17h
IDK. I think you should just bite the bullet and tell him.
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Yeah, precisely. Kids know when you're hiding things from them, or outright lying.
So just simple, no big deal, just the truth -- like Undisciplined said
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I wasn't prepared to deal with this question so soon. I'll let you know how it goes later.
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I don't have kids (yet), but I would start with this, expressing it for a child, with words that s/he can understand, but not like a little baby, but a human.
Sex is an expression of ourselves. Sex is connection with yourself or with other/s. Sex is not bad, nor weird, nor a taboo.
We are different (boys and girls), but we feel the same when we touch, look, taste, etc. Explore yourself throught sex. Feel your body, and know it well. Deep, any and each part of it. Then, later, you can be ready to explore and sense another body, and you'll understand there's no difference.
Pleasure is only one of the feelings you van sense.
This is only a sumup, but from here, expand. Never make it a problem, or a taboo. Sex is not bad. Is our society and culture who made it look bad.
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Thank you so much! You just gave me an idea.
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Thank you so much! You just gave me an idea.
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Wow!!! I am certainly glad my kid were all boys!!! I would just say sex is about babies and add that you could go into details much later. Good luck with this!!! BTW, what do you think brought this on? She must have some sort of reason for asking, doesn’t she?
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Do you think it's easier to talk about this topic with boys than with girls? She started asking because she heard the word in a series she was watching with my husband (the big bang theory) they said something like "let's have sex" ... that's when she started asking.
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"Sex is how adults make babies, and we'll talk more when you're older."
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I would say, Its how moms get pregnant and make kids. And it takes a man and a woman. And tell her the other details are for later.
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I think she is kind of young to explain sex to. I would stick with it being the determining factor of whether a person is a man or woman but say it is an adult word that we don’t use.
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40 sats \ 1 reply \ @bief57 OP 18h
I told him that it's an adult word and shouldn't be said. And he keeps asking me, "but why?" "What is sex?"
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Obviously. That is the meaning society put on that word, but is not the real thing. Sex goes further (I have expressed it all in another answer here).
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a recreational activity, what do you mean by that hahaha as parents we will one day face that and other questions that may leave us cold, it is all about the quality of communication you have with her, showing her all the maturity you can.
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0 sats \ 1 reply \ @Satosora 18h
She is 7, she still has a ways to go before she needs to know. Unless you have a different opinion?
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I think he shouldn't know the details. But since he's asking, I need to be the one to give him an age-appropriate answer before he asks that question at school or at the football academy.
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