I am showcasing how hard it is to get no-KYC bitcoin. To get to a sidechain I need BTC first. Why would I do this after getting no KYC BTC?
I guess there are 2 different things here. We might be talking pass each other when we talk about non-kyc bitcoin. What is your objective?
  1. Have coins that are not attached to your identity
  2. No one (specially no gov) knowing you ever bought bitcoin
Number 1 is easy, and you can do it by just following the steps we outlined above. As for number 2, yeah, it is hard. Specially considering that you cannot "undo" KYC. Once you've given that info it is out there. Best thing you can do it is sell (preferably at a loss) and then re-buy it in a P2P marketplace.
Depending on your jurisdiction this might be easier or harder. In Latin America we have some vibrant communities and there's little tracking effort (or capabilities) from our governments so I think it is safe to even do small (< 10K USD) P2P transactions using the banking system.
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Yea a normal person isn’t hoping on these p2p platforms. I can because I’m deep in the space. If I asked me friend to do this on my behalf he would laugh in my face. Yea the key point here is no-KYC at point of sale. Not forward privacy with coinjoins
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You're never going to be satisfied with the answers you get here because there simply are not cookie cutter granma-friendly procedure.
And the reason for that is simple: the government rushes to put hurdles in your way as soon as a good solution comes up. This is not something that can be solved with tech alone and it will always be hard to keep your privacy.
Another way of looking at it is that you're trying to find a seamless and private interface between decentralized perfect money (Bitcoin) and the legacy financial system, which is centralized and inefficient by design. You simply cannot square a circle.