I think the suppression of impatience is key. It must have taken me half a decade to learn to control my overt dominance in large settings, and trust people enough to steer from the smaller followup meetings, through suggestion rather than brute force. That was a very hard skill to learn.

This is for example why I have never joined the Bitcoin PR Review Club (even though I've wanted to since forever) and instead just read the logs, because I'm not sure that on IRC I could have the patience and self-control to not make a mess, I think that it's better for everyone if I'm not there.