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I would say you do speak with some authority.
It certainly doesn't seem fair to put the burden of the accommodation on the professor. I'm surprised universities don't have something like an ombudsman but for assisting with accommodations.
As to requesting accommodations as a parent, I imagine it is very difficult. I am so frustrated with the US educational system that I avoid the problem by homeschooling, but this is hardly an answer for everyone.
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Homeschool is certainly something that crossed our mind many times. I am very much open to it, I think my wife is more hesitant.
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