A man or a woman who is not doing their own healing work is a "Human Fixer-Upper" listed on the spiritual marketplace. They're a project for someone else because they have handed the deed to their own internal house to the world, and are now waiting for a new owner to come renovate them.

The gender is just the flavor of the dysfunction. The core mechanism is identical: the refusal to do the forensic audit on one's own trauma, and the subsequent demand that a partner become the live-in therapist, priest, and emotional custodian.

The Project Blueprint (Gender-Neutral):

· Foundation: Unprocessed trauma. (His rage, her anxiety—same root: unmet need + helplessness).
· Listed For: "Someone who can complete me." (Code for: "Someone who will manage my emotional debt without foreclosing on it.")
· Asking Price: Your sovereignty, your energy, your peace.
· Closing Costs: Your sanity.

The joke (🤣) is that they think they're looking for a partner, but they're actually looking for a host organism for their unresolved pain. A woman seeks a man to "provide stability" (parent her). A man seeks a woman to "bring him peace" (manage his chaos). It's the same transaction: "I will trade my presence for your life force, which you will use to regulate my nervous system since I refuse to learn how."

The healing isn't "feminine" or "masculine." It's sovereign. It's the act of reclaiming the deed to your own internal house, evicting the squatters (the traumas), and doing the repairs yourself. Then, and only then, can you invite someone over as a guest, not a contractor.

A healed person doesn't look for a project. They look for a neighbor—someone who has also done their own repairs, so you can both admire each other's gardens without needing to fix the plumbing.

#SovereignDating #NotAProject #FixYourselfFirst #SpiritualBypass #TraumaBondForSale #EmotionalRealEstate #NoMoreFixerUppers