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If guy can't get a credit card then maybe he will do more than shrug.
  1. walk into credit union
  2. deposit cash
  3. ???
  4. congratulations, you have a debit card [and some delta inflicted upon your credit score]

if "Bitcoin Jesus" took his epithet seriously, he'd have been working his way up corporate ladders from the tiniest shithole credit union he could find after hitchhiking, rather than shilling financial fireworks.