Gratitude is easy when life is going well. But when life is hard, it can often feel impossible to see a single thing that is going right — and that's exactly why it's so important that we try our best to do so.
I know what you're thinking: gratitude, now, when life feels so difficult and people are struggling so much and the world is so unceasingly cruel?
Yes. Gratitude, even now.
Where to begin?
With realizing what gratitude actually is. Gratitude is the choice to look around at how others have helped you, a recognition that reminds you that you are not alone in this world. Other people have contributed so much to your life in countless ways, and you are the constant beneficiary of their talents, their heart, and their courage. Gratitude is not about what you do for yourself — it's about what others have done for you. It makes you realize that you are connected to others.
And with recognizing what gratitude is not. Gratitude is not toxic positivity. You do not have to deny what is really challenging and painful in your life; gratitude just asks that you also spend a moment looking for what is really beautiful and good, too. It makes you realize that, even amidst the pain you are feeling, there is something good here, too.
When someone realizes that 1) they are not alone in the world, and 2) their suffering can exist alongside their joy, it changes them in two key ways.
First, it makes them more resilient — something that's been observed even in traumatic situations:
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Veterans who develop post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) have lower gratitude levels than those who do not
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Breast cancer patients who wrote a gratitude diary every day for two weeks were able to function more effectively, felt more supported, and were better able to use effective coping strategies than those who did not
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Police officers post-Hurricane Katrina who were more grateful experienced lower levels of depression
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Americans after 9/11 who were more grateful experienced less overall psychological distress
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People who recover from traumatic experiences are able to do so in large part by finding some positive benefit from the experience
Second, it makes them more compassionate. Gratitude makes people want to help others. They see that they have enough and want to make sure others have enough, too. This inner change has the power to transform our communities, workplaces, and our world into peaceful environments, where we make our own contributions and celebrate what others share, too.
Today, I hope you'll take a moment to reflect on something you're grateful for — knowing that this small act has the power to start changing you and changing the world for the better.