As the teacher-in-charge of the Dance Club, I attended a talk co-delivered by 3 accomplished dancers, and one of them said, “enjoy the struggle”. Hardworking dancers may devote hundreds of hours into their craft, but they may not achieve fame and fortune, which are unfortunately still the markers of success in Singapore. So aspiring dancers must have a passion for dancing.

Her words struck a chord with me because I certainly don’t enjoy the struggle associated with parenting. I think in the whole I’m dealing better with it because I’m getting used to the extermination of my social life and personal freedom. But I don’t want to reframe my mind and condition myself to enjoy parenting. Not when the last time I had a decent night off was last May. Not when I cannot even choose what I want to eat on certain days because I must consider what my son prefers. I will do all this begrudgingly, but I refuse to love it.

I’m not sure exactly why. Maybe I don’t want to expend the cognitive and emotional energy involved in reframing parenting? Maybe I’m just stubborn.

But I’m fine! Putting aside my phone now to give my son a huge hug as I pick him up from the childcare centre (and another night of slogging till 11pm) 🤣