Governance does not need to be coercive. That's the fundamental distinction we see. All of the issues you point out are widely covered in the libertarian literature. You could look into something like David Friedman's Machinery of Freedom if you want a bunch of possible nuts and bolts answers.

As far as I'm concerned, if your with us for now that's good enough. If we ever get to where a stateless society is on the table, I'll try to convince you of the other stuff then.