Its a really tough balance. I think about that father alot (who had 500M and left his daughter 100M). I mean sure you can only leave your kid $1m but then what....give the rest away? That leads to its own turmoil with the kids as they feel you gave the money to strangers....

I don't pretend to know the answer honestly. The lawyers in the office used to say "giving away money is 10x harder than making it" and I understand their view.

Some families do a tiered approach: $1m trust at 25....then $5m at 35....$5m at 45...etc.. Others try to do "merit" based giving: $1m when graduating college, $1m when you get married, etc etc

Neither system is perfect and both can be either gamed by kids or abused in the sense that it just leads them to do nothing substantial with their lives.

One father invested all his money back into his company at time of his death (of which his children werent at the time shareholders in) and said that his kids should get jobs in the company and work their way up into an shareholder position.

No easy solutions, to be honest.