(Note: Archive.is cannot handle Aftermath/Deadspin code, and cuts off the final paragraph in any article; use 12ft.io or an incognito window if you get paywalled.)
Love all the snark in this, including this bit from near the end:
Because if you continue on this course, I will be forced to completely switch over to Linux, and neither of us want that. Do you have any idea how annoying that would make me? I would get really into distros. I would lovingly extol the benefits of Pop!_OS to strangers. I would get really into Nix. That’s a demon you need to keep caged.