Very informative. I have picked up on the antagonism towards being defined as a woman, even when it's self reflection.

Undisciplined

sure, femininity is learned. you find a positive ideal if you look. 
I think women serve beauty uniquely, perhaps I should think more on how it fits into the mold that means femininity. But as soon as you start to define what a woman is, don't women get a little perturbed, no matter what? She wants freedom. She wants to be a contradiction. She wants to be beautiful and powerful. She wants to be weak and strong.

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I think most men would expect an answer that included beauty, compassion, nurturing, etc. But, again, what do we know?

I was talking to my wife about this a bit. Her answer was something like I expected, except that she only feels that women are told that's what femininity is. It would be sad to me if there was no positive ideal of femininity that resonates with women, but rather just something that feels imposed by others.