You are an individual. Don’t let Society force its norms on you especially one who’s views are so asinine that men and women are the same. And yes “it’s all on the man” as you say. You come across very whiny and have a defeatist attitude. A lot of people on this thread have given you very good advice and instead of embracing it and trying something different you have whined and complained and been sarcastic on every comment. That’s no way to live life and no way to have a girl be interested in spending time with you. And as others have pointed out woman are more perspective than men and can sense that sort of thing even if you think you are hiding it in front of them.