When you grow up in a country dominated by a communist dictatorship, you have to face the fading of your family and social circle. One Christmas or birthday you are celebrating with your whole family and the next there are more and more empty chairs at home. In my family, I was the first to decide to emigrate. The first Christmas and birthday without them was a celebration by video call that was interrupted every 15 seconds due to the poor internet signal. The following year, the family continues to fragment, the video call screen is now divided into 3 or 4 parts, different time zones, different countries, and so the days go by, surviving, carrying on with the same wish every day, that of being together again, but then you grieve because you know it is very unlikely that it will come true. Once again, you have to deal with and understand that perhaps your life will go by wishing for a hug. You ask yourself day after day, when will it happen? Will it be soon? Or will it never happen? I have been uncertain for 7 years. You see your children growing up and your loved ones were not able to experience those precious moments of motherhood by your side and your parents were not able to enjoy being grandparents. I feel a bit envious of people who can enjoy their loved ones and I dislike people who complain about having them around, people who complain about visits from their parents or siblings. I think that in this case the saying that says "nobody knows what they have until they lose it" is very true.