The nights are a long drag when you are a parent, but thanks to McDonald’s, my son got a boost of jet rocket fuel. He was so eager to unbox his Happy Meal toy that he stripped and showered himself on his own accord. He has never made my life that easy before! Normally, he would be glued to the TV set and impervious to my increasingly impatient calls. Oh, the power that a Minecraft toy wields!

In other news, my daughter turned out to be a gangster because she just snatched my fried chicken and left her half-eaten nugget in its place. Then, she sank her teeth into MY chicken with aplomb, showing that she meant business. I had to wrestle for scraps of chicken discreetly throughout the dinner, lest I starve.

McDonald’s may be undergoing shrinkflation, but it has cemented loyalty among the youngest members of my household.