You remember correctly. I can only think of one book on the subject that I like, which is this one, but it is good. The best content tends to be not-books, which I guess isn't surprising. The site I linked to above is a treasure for that stuff. Maggie Appleton writes some very approachable things -- here's an example.

Another way to get an intuition is to Fuck Around And Find Out. The two best tools for this are probably Obsidian and Logseq. I've used both, but I mostly use this stupid thing I made myself that has accrued like geological time, hacked together out of emacs org mode and elisp. Org-roam is a more sensible variant of that approach that I keep intending to try, except my investment in my own arcane tool is so high.