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How to be more agentic usefulfictions.substack.com/p/1154dba1-49f6-4feb-b091-6d4a7eefa94d

4380 sats \ 7 comments \ @elvismercury 24 Feb BooksAndArticles

For reasons I can't explain exactly, I've gotten pretty good at asking the right question. In the middle of the scramble of short-term obsessions and fixations, where a whole group of people is furiously doing {x}, I've become practiced at trying to figure out what matters. Often it's not {x}, or anything else that you'd think. This has not wholly been a blessing. It means that, sometimes, I'm slow to do what needs doing. But overall it's been super important, and a big advantage.

That's probably why this article resonated with me so strongly. Specifically, this:

The idea of finding real edges, as contrasted with “eking out wins by grinding harder than everyone,” first clicked for me when I started playing poker. [...] Two friends and I maniacally studied reads together, and we all had out-of-distribution results. But when we’d tell other pros what we were doing, the response from most was “nuh-uh, that’s not a thing.” They weren’t willing to consider the possibility that reads were valuable, maybe because they didn’t want to feel obligated to study them.

That's what I'm getting at with the questions. In this example, the author looked around, and said: maybe there's something super important that other people are ignoring because they're fixated on doing this combinatorial analysis? And everyone was like: no, that's dumb. And she did it, and it turned out to be, in fact, a giant advantage.

The other reason the article resonated, probably, is that I'm so bad at many of the other sources of agency she describes. And so the article is a tease, like a song you hear in the distance, that suggests that maybe there's 10x more upside if you can get un-stuck by whatever's sticking you.

Maybe it will inspire some of ya'll, too.

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849 sats \ 3 replies \ @ek 24 Feb freebie

Two friends and I maniacally studied reads together, and we all had out-of-distribution results. But when we’d tell other pros what we were doing, the response from most was “nuh-uh, that’s not a thing.” They weren’t willing to consider the possibility that reads were valuable, maybe because they didn’t want to feel obligated to study them.

What are reads in this context? Soul reads? Reading hands? Reading people?

The moat of low status is one of my favorite concepts, courtesy of my husband Sasha. The idea is that making changes in your life, especially when learning new skill sets, requires you to cross a moat of low status, a period of time where you are actually bad at the thing or fail to know things that are obvious to other people.

Picking up a new sport is a good example of this.

I still remember the old man that watched a friend and me (we were both new to bouldering back then) failing at the start of a route over and over again. While we were taking a break, we watched him do the route and he just did it so effortlessly on his first attempt.

We then were very interested and asked him how he did it. He mentioned that we have to "use our hips" and proceeded to show us.

I kept failing until he showed us again very slowly how to do it (it must have been exhausting for him to do it this slow) and then I got it.

When I was able to move my hip in the way to get out of the starting position, I instantly was unable to do it the wrong way anymore. It felt so obvious now.

We were both so thankful and I will never forget this moment. My hip movements belong to him now.

Recently, I picked up Taekwondo and it's the same feeling of learning "obvious things" all over again and moving past them and it's addicting.

521 sats \ 2 replies \ @elvismercury OP 24 Feb freebie

What are reads in this context? Soul reads? Reading hands? Reading people?

Reading people's body language is what she intended, I think -- basically, stuff that has nothing to do w/ the actual mechanics of poker, but intuition of how people act. At least, this is how I took it, since it would confirm the idea of outsized advantages from going 'out of band' to find important influences on stuff.

We then were very interested and asked him how he did it. He mentioned that we have to "use our hips" and proceeded to show us.

Good example of the power of just asking people for help; and also: of finding people who know stuff you don't know, and want to know, and observing them. Both super under-rated. I feel like almost any normal person can probably 10x their progress wrt something important by doing this.

0 sats \ 1 reply \ @ek 24 Feb freebie

Reading people's body language is what she intended, I think

I thought so too but then this surprised me:

But when we’d tell other pros what we were doing, the response from most was “nuh-uh, that’s not a thing.” They weren’t willing to consider the possibility that reads were valuable, maybe because they didn’t want to feel obligated to study them.

I thought being able to read people is an obvious important skill in poker. I mean the term "poker face" is literally about not letting other people read you, no?

Good example of the power of just asking people for help; and also: of finding people who know stuff you don't know, and want to know, and observing them. Both super under-rated. I feel like almost any normal person can probably 10x their progress wrt something important by doing this.

Yeah, that's what I love about bouldering.¹

Just observing people is so much fun and helpful. Also, sometimes, it feels like an unwritten rule that if someone is trying really hard but keeps doing the same mistake, that someone more skilled comes out of nowhere and flashes the route² while they are taking a break.

It's also a matter of staying humble since you don't want to do this in a way to discourage them like "look how easy it is for me". You just want to help them.³

It's probably true for many other sports, I just have the most experience in bouldering. ↩
Flashing means to finish the route on the first attempt. ↩
Okay, maybe a little bit of showing off is included but it's all in good fun. ↩

397 sats \ 1 reply \ @k00b 24 Feb

I've gotten pretty good at asking the right question.

I'd like to be better at this. Is there something you did to make yourself this way or is it who you are?

Burnout is the ultimate agency-killer. This is so true that I’ve learned to identify a reduction in agency as one of the first signs of burnout, one that shows up even before I consciously realize what’s happening.

Good burnout detection method.

A switch flips and I start looking for ways to rule out ideas and actions, to conclude they won’t work or aren’t necessary, rather than chasing better versions.

I'll usually unflip the switch by forcing myself into "yes and" or a state of negative capability. I can't tell now if I'm unflipping burnout or just turning off the alarm.

494 sats \ 0 replies \ @elvismercury OP 24 Feb

I'd like to be better at this. Is there something you did to make yourself this way or is it who you are?

I think it's reps.

I realized, a few years ago, that without ever intending to, I'd been training for years: writing in a journal, digging into things, trying to understand them, and part of understanding them was asking questions, trying to go back to the very root of whatever it was so at least I'd know what I didn't know. And since it was just me, staring at a notebook, I could afford to be really stupid. Like, who cares if I reveal, in my notebook, what a dunce I am, how I don't understand the basic things about x?

I think that was it. I just got in the habit of doing that, and after thousands of hours of it, it began to pay off when I got in an honest environment that valued truth-seeking. Probably the second part should be emphasized more -- it's a rare environment where trying to get at the truth is rewarded. I wound up in one by accident.

0 sats \ 0 replies \ @go 24 Feb

if you can get un-stuck by whatever's sticking you.

Let the games begin

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