It sounds to me like you are looking too hard for things to be incredibly meaningful to you.

Instead, you need to rediscover the simple pleasures of experience. The enjoyment in things that you are presently dismissing as “unimportant”.

“What matters” to us depends entirely on our attitude and point of view. If you’re looking for something that “matters” at some ultimate metaphysical level, you’re going to see all of life as unimportant.

However, if you step back and try to experience the simple things as enjoyable again, you’ll suddenly see that you’ve been dismissing a nearly infinite supply of enjoyable experiences as meaningless.

Taking a walk, smelling the leaves, having a coffee, sex, seeing a beautiful innocent child, climbing a wall, hiking up a mountain, feeling an old book, …. All of these things really are enough. Don’t look past everything; look into everything.