Mention Japanese weddings, and the image of a stately couple solemnly going through wedding customs in their traditional kimono at a shrine inevitably comes to mind. However, this is but one of the many ways in which Japanese couples choose to get married to cement their relationship. Western-style weddings ¹ are also commonplace, perhaps because foreign practices are viewed as cool and fashionable in Japan.

Particularly in recent years, many young couples, eager to create a cosy ambience and organize a light-hearted wedding, turn to the trend of Kyoyukon (Shared Wedding) as an inspiration. Kyoyukon aims to let wedding guests feel as if they are the ones getting married and rejoice together with the couple. What kind of ways do such couples employ then? Read on to find out!

A typical Western-style ceremony involves the couple getting ordained in front of a priest. While this method is popular in Japan as well (You don't even have to be an actual priest in order to officiate the ceremony!), an increasing number of Japanese couples opt to hold a Jinzen shiki (civil ceremony). This is so because the groom and bride can proudly sign the wedding certificate in front of their beloved family and friends, thus eliciting gasps of happiness from the very attentive audience! Some couples will also get their parents to be witnesses and sign their names on the certificate, adding to the significance of this historic moment!

Wanting their guests to be immersed in the occasion, many couples display their ingenuity and incorporate engaging activities into their wedding. For example, some selected guests may be given a rose stalk before the wedding. They will be asked to present their rose to the groom, who will then arrange these roses to form a bouquet for the ecstatic bride. More adventurous couples may even hide their wedding rings in boxes underneath each guest's chairs. Surely, the excitement level will reach fever pitch as the guests scramble to see if the rings are hidden in their box! The two lucky guests will finally give back the rings to the couple so that they can go ahead with the ring exchange ceremony. Also, the cake-cutting ceremony is leveraged to create a casual feel. After feeding each other cake, many a couple painstakingly serve each guest a slice of cake so that they can exchange a few warm words. The relaxed vibes generated by these activities really help to make joyous feelings contagious!

The notion of a shared wedding does not just consist of the couple thinking of ways to involve their guests; it also includes friends and colleagues of the couple taking charge and putting up surprise performances. In fact, extroverted guests will go as far as to cross-dress in cute costumes and show off their funky dance moves! They will then teach all guests some simple hand gestures so that everyone can join in the dance and make merry. Other groups of guests may decline from dancing but will prepare touching video messages to express their well wishes for the couple. Either way, such outpouring of love from the guests helps make the wedding a memorable one replete of wonderful shared memories.

Expressing gratitude is very prevalent in Japanese culture, so Kyoyukon is, of course, the perfect opportunity for couples to acknowledge how they have been supported by their family and friends and give their sincere thanks. In order to do that, many couples will give every guest a booklet for the reception in which a seating plan with all the names of the guests is thoughtfully presented. Not only that, they will also show a video that depicts the guests' lively and animated expressions during the earlier part of the wedding towards the finale. Seeing yourself in the booklet and video is bound to make you feel warm and fuzzy inside and feel more connected to the couple!

A wedding is arguably the most important milestone in one's life as he pledges his undying love to his chosen partner with the blessings of his loved ones. In order to make this monumental occasion truly unforgettable, we should then learn from the Japanese and inject ways to encourage active participation from the guests for our own wedding!