No More Crypto

Well, I heard that you're leaving (leaving)
Leaving bitcoin far behind (so far behind, doo-wop)
'Cause you found a brand new altcoin (doo-wop, doo-wop, doo-wop)
And you're thinkin' its star’s gonna shine (doo-wop, doo-wop, ahh-ah-ah)

So I pulled (I pulled) up its name (name out) on coinmarketcap (ooh-ooh)
And I found it's a rank piece of trash
Now I won't ever meet you or hear you out again (ooh-ooh)
I'll just watch as your tokens all crash (ah) (you)

That's right (that's right) I’m not gonna waste my time (ooh)
Be glad (I'm glad) that you're discord I won't join (ooh)
'Cause I'd rather spend eternity eating shards of broken glass (ah-ah-ah-ah)
Than hear one more pitch of an altcoin (ahh-ah-ah-ah)

I guess I might seem kinda toxic (ooh)
But I've gotten my share of crypto lumps (ooh)
Stick with bitcoin, run your own node, buy it peer to peer, take no loans
And avoid all these scammy pumps and dumps (ahh)

Oh, so buddy, don't come shilling me with your small caps (ooh)
Your discord I ain't gonna join
‘Cause I'd rather get a hundred thousand paper cuts on my face (ah-ah-ah)
Than hear one more pitch of an altcoin (ahh-ah-ah-ah)

I'd rather rip out my intestines with a fork
Than hear how your token's second-gen
I'd rather slam my fingers in a double door
Again and again and again and again and again

I'd rather have my blood sucked out by leeches (leeches)
Shove an ice pick up the tip of my groin
I'd rather clean all the bathrooms (ah-ah-ah) in Grand Central Station with my tongue
Than hear one more pitch of an altcoin (ahh-ah-ah-ah)

Yes, I'd rather jump naked on a huge pile of thumb tacks (ah-ah-ah)
I’d rather squeeze glue in my nostrils til they conjoin (ah-ah-ah)
I'd rather dive into a swimming pool filled up (ah-ah-ah) with double-edged razor blades
Than hear one more pitch of an altcoin (ahh-ah-ah-ah)

I'd rather rip my heart right out of my ribcage (ah-ah-ah)
With my bare hands and then throw it on the floor (ah-ah-ah)
And stomp on it til I die
Than hear one more pitch of an altcoin (ahh-ah-ah-ah)

• Little L2s
• Who Wrote the Code
• No More Crypto
• Why Do Fools Buy Altcoins
• La Bitcoin song