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If a zombie was looking for brains, he'd walk right by you.

You're about as sharp as a rubber ball.

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You're about as useful as a knitted condom.

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After meeting you, I’ve decided I am in favor of abortion in cases of incest.

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Are you doing OK today? You look like the guy in the zombie movie who's been bitten but is trying to keep it quiet.

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Are you always this stupid, or is this a special occasion?

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Your stupidity will increase my intelligence.
Is a simple transforming energy.

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You're so full of shit, the toilet is jealous