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11 sats \ 3 replies \ @Shugard 5 Dec \ on: Tough love or compassionate teacher? What actually works? alter_native
They definitely need a lot of love! You have to see in the child what the child does not see. You need a lot of patience. But you need rules and standards. And yes, you need punishment! The child will explore the world and you should help. Find and satisfy their curiosity and go from there. But teach norms and behaviour along the way. At a certain age he will explore beyond the boundaries you have drawn and cross them deliberately. Like in the Lion King when Sima goes to the elephant graveyard. You should protect your child, but you should also enforce your own rules and punish misbehaviour like Mufasa.
There is a lot of truth in the carrot-and-stick approach.
Don't be weak, just show love. Be strict but kind. It's much better.
Check out my profile for BTC teacher posts
Also this might give you some insight: #768174
Great comment. Thank you. Most parents don't believe me when I say this but I pretty much have never punished my kids. They are 16 And 17 now. I remember putting my son in time out once. Not to say I didn't make it clear what I expected of them without yelling. The key was I was very clear and consistent. And they respected me so they wanted to do right by me. I also always showed them respect and explained things thoroughly so they didn't really ever misbehave. It sounds unrealistic maybe. That's how I remember it though.
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I feel good about my ability to teach and to parent. I have also run a company and dealt with teaching many employees. I make posts like this to have great discussions. Not really for advice. Although I do learn a lot always.
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