Truth and Beauty - An Interview with PlebPoet
A while ago, I was certified as a pleb by @plebpoet. Today, I want to share why this means something special.
Before my first visit to Austin, I was very curious about the person behind this metaphor about creating art that had blown me away. I didn’t know I could appreciate a 'literature thing' so much. Through her writing, I felt some kind of connection that I have not felt before. At the same time, I felt a little guilty because I’d seen her nym before but hadn’t cared about who was behind it. In fact, my first impression of her online personality was this post where I thought she was just a drunk girl and I didn’t appreciate her usage of ALL CAPS, lol. Anyway.
Since I was so curious now, I was very happy when she asked me for an interview during my first visit. It meant I could spend some dedicated time with her and ask her some questions, too. I find nyms very intriguing, so naturally, the first question that I had in mind for her was:
Q1: What’s the story behind the nym "plebpoet"?
I have seen someone naming themselves "plebdev" before I picked "plebpoet" so the "pleb" part is not original. The origin story for the name is also connected to PlebLab and Austin since I moved here for it. I don’t really remember, but it could be that someone said "plebpoet" to me first, so maybe the whole nym is not original. But "pleb" holds a special meaning for me, much like poetry does.
Q2: What does "pleb" mean to you?
For me, being a pleb means having a particular attitude, characterized by honesty and humility. It also means that you pursue what you find meaningful without expecting reward or recognition. For example, I consider myself a craftsman pleb as I mentioned in my article about Pleb Crafts:
Pleb crafts is truly a beautiful thing. It’s humble and it’s honest. Because of that, it can grow. By letting myself discover where my hands are useful, reverently and daily, I may stumble into my greatest cause. I may lead others with me into a fulfilling practice of artistic expression, battling against the limitations of reality. But if not, that’s okay, at least I get a t-shirt out of it.
Q3: During my research, I have found out that you used the nym "btc_cassandra" in the past. Together with your profile picture, I realized that you’re referring to Cassandra, a Trojan princess. Why her and why is she pulling her hair out?
Cassandra was also a priestess. It is said that she received the gift of seeing the future from Apollo, who had fallen in love with her. When he realized she did not return his love, he couldn’t reclaim the divine gift, so he cursed her: no one would ever believe her prophecies. There are different versions of this story though. But in all stories she knew that the city will get burned down but nobody believed her.
I picked her because I thought it was a good nym that had a narrative structure underneath it that I didn’t create but others could recognize. I thought it was clever, she saw the future but was misunderstood, sometimes I have felt that way. Sometimes I have written from that frustration.
Regarding the hair: Funny, I didn’t see that she was doing that! But I think pulling your hair out in that situation is fair. You can also see the city in flames behind her.
Q4: I know that you got into poetry because of your literature degree, but how did you get into literature?
I always kept a journal and when I took a test for college, my best score was in English.
Q5: What do you now see that others might not see without your background in art?
She lights up and immediately responds, as if she had been waiting for someone to ask her this question. However, what follows also includes parts of later conversations.
The truth and beauty of life. I think I am uniquely fit to see, appreciate and respond to it because of my background, but also because of who I am. I am an observer, I felt that I was an observer even when I was a small child. I am so sensitive to beauty, and what is true is so beautiful to me. But that there is truth and beauty woven into the everyday in a million small ways, this is what I hope to help people discover through my work. This is what poetry is for, revealing the small, observable truths of everyday life in a beautiful way with simple words on a page.
Q6: And what does poetry mean to you?
Poetry is about self-expression which is pretty important to me. But there is also mystery and intrigue to it that shrouds poetry for a lot of people. I think that’s fine, but it used to bug me. I use this mystery to my advantage sometimes, because perhaps I’ll write a poem and I don’t want you to know exactly what I’m writing it about, I can cover it in the mystery and confusion of ambiguity, and you can still see its beauty. Ambiguity is essential in a poem. There are as many ways to read a poem as there are people to read it.
Q7: I think you see yourself more as a poet (hence the nym) than as an artist. Is that true? Why?
I don’t differentiate much between poet and artist, but a literature degree makes it easier to be seen as a poet than an artist, especially when I have completed course work about poetry.
However, I haven’t always felt comfortable calling myself an ’artist’, when I don’t produce much, or don’t have anything I’m known for. The same goes for calling myself a poet. I don’t want to sound self-aggrandizing, but sometimes it feels that way.
I’m also not doing it professionally, but that’s sort of what people expect of you if you use the title. For example, if I were to say I’m a beekeeper, you would ask me how many bees do I keep or how many jars of honey do I process, you know? But I have to do other things to sustain my life, and I don’t want writing to become that. I don’t want to squeeze life out of my writing. I use writing as expression, not as livelihood. If I did lean on it to keep me alive, as in bring in my money, my relationship to writing would flip to the opposite, and that would be a scary place for me.
It’s the same with my journal, it’s not daily. I just go to my journal when I have something to say. I go to write when I have something to express.
I once asked her if asking artists to design a website is like asking a programmer to fix a printer and she said yes with this follow-up question: "But you can fix a printer, right?"
Q8: Can you imagine you’ll ever get bored of poetry? Is there a life after plebpoet?
Oh yes, I definitely lost interest in it for a while. During college, I was super into it, doing poetry readings and events like that; making zines and giving them to people.
But after college, poetry didn’t seem to have a place anymore. I entered the real world and noticed how poetry was not valued. It was also lonely. I wrote about that in Pleb Crafts, too.
To get back into it, I had to go into myself again, get back in touch with what makes me who I am. I also had to stop feeling ashamed about it. Too many things in my life and people around me were making me feel shame that I just didn’t need to feel. I had to throw that off and decide it wasn’t useful, and get on with my life. Plus poetry is a private thing, as well. So I need to spend a lot of time with myself and in silence to write it.
Q9: What will your next book be about? Poetry right?
No, I wouldn’t say so! I want to write about motherhood. A year ago, we were worried that I was pregnant but now it’s just uncertainty because you can never be fully prepared. I am trying my best though and I think writing a book about it can help.
Q10: Do you spend a lot of time reading?
I listen to a lot when I am working at my job watering plants in various offices around Austin; about 80% of that are audiobooks and 20% is just entertainment.
When I asked what her fancy job description is, she mentioned it was "plant technician" and I laughed a little because I didn’t understand what could be technical about it. She rightfully corrected me and said "technician" doesn’t mean it has to be about tech, it just means that you know what you’re doing. We then talked about the details of caring for plants. I feel bad that my initial reaction was to laugh but she took it well. She also mentioned that @supertestnet described it as being an "aquafarer".
Q11: How is it to be a plant technician?
I like that I don’t have to talk to anyone, and I can work on my own schedule. But there are also things I don’t like about it: it’s not a passion business and there are no opportunities, it’s just every day business as usual so I got tired doing this job 20 hours a week for a year.
Q12: What is your biggest problem right now?
That I feel purposeless; there is no BIG project in my life. I think I am living too much in the moment vs shaping my future. My job also doesn’t give me challenges. And I start a lot more things than I finish (even the book about this topic that my mom recommended to me). It’s not necessarily a bad thing if you still manage to finish enough, but I think the lack of a fulfilling experience after completing something big has become my biggest problem.
I also asked this question on SN; it’s one of my favorite questions for myself and other people.
Q13: What is your most precious memory?
Ohhh, mhhh. There are many with my husband and on my own, but I wrote about a specific one in My Opening Remarks. It was a fleeting ambiguous moment. I also once visited the city gardens with my family, where my brother and I came upon these wind chimes.
We talked more about various memories. Hearing about hers made me feel like I was there with her, too. But I wasn’t, I only met her a few weeks before our interview, which makes me feel like I missed out on so many experiences we could have shared.
Q14: And what is your most embarrassing one if you don’t mind sharing?
I would say my most embarrassing moment was in middle school as a preteen. We went to a summer camp by the church for a week. One night, we formed groups and each group had to prepare a performance; in our case it was a skit. We decided to reenact a scene from Grease, a musical. We performed one of the songs in the movie and crossdressed girls as boys. Apparently, I was really convincing as a boy with a hoodie, sneakers and no visible hair.
This story reminded me of this scene in Game of Thrones. I also asked her if she had more guys than girls as friends and she said yes.
Q15: Do you think it’s weird not knowing what people might already know about you through your writing before you've even met them? Does it make you feel vulnerable?
I actually prefer when people read what I write about before they meet me. It’s easier for me to show who I am through writing. In writing, I am more thoughtful while in person, I say things I wouldn’t necessarily write that way.
This was a very interesting conversation for me since for me, it was the opposite: When people read about me first online and then meet me, I am worried they’ll be disappointed since my online personality doesn’t necessarily match me in real life. I don’t really openly talk about the stuff I openly write about online.
Q16: Regarding Culture and Choice and How a Lefty Became a Maxi: Do you have thoughts why you changed your mind about the culture you were in but not others?
My friends were also in the protest that I described, but our trajectory didn’t scare them. I realized I didn’t have control over myself; I had no agency; I was merely a pawn in some game. My friends weren’t scared of that. I mentioned a few more details about that experience here.
Q17: What’s the story behind "cause we are living in a material world and I am a literature girl"?
@k00b was referencing a Madonna song because I wrote "I am a literature girl".
May we all stumble into our greatest cause.
