Oh and don't get me started about cultural appropriation, lol

I was once asked by someone that's close to me if it's okay if they wear traditional clothes of my country to a traditional party of my country

Damn, that started an argument about cultural appropriation, lol

I was bewildered that they asked me first

Who am I, the ambassador of that country? lol

I mentioned how I think that's not solving racism, that's actually racism itself, lol

To say who should be allowed to wear what

I know what you mean, I encountered similar things with gender pronouns.

For me, it seems to mostly just be patronism. They want to help a group by protecting it since they feel they are in the minority and thus need protection.

I tried to argue that I think these groups can speak for themselves and it's mostly virtue signaling if everyone starts to change their language to accommodate them. I think that makes the situation even worse for them since they will be the scapegoat of the public. "We need to change our language because of them?!"

But I am not sure if the majority of the minority even wants to be treated specially.

If someone changes their language to not hurt me, I would be pretty pissed lol

Don't you want to be treated like everyone else? Isn't that what equality is about? Not that everyone gets their special rights?