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You may have a sparsely attended funereal
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Your birth certificate should be rewritten as a letter of apology
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You got your looks from your mother who stands on a corner
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You have a face that makes onions cry.
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If a zombie was looking for brains, he'd walk right by you.
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You're about as sharp as a rubber ball.
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You're about as useful as a knitted condom.
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After meeting you, I’ve decided I am in favor of abortion in cases of incest.
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Are you doing OK today? You look like the guy in the zombie movie who's been bitten but is trying to keep it quiet.
It's the parent's job to raise their children right. So, looking at you, it's obvious that they quit after just one day.