110 sats \ 15 replies \ @siggy47 7 Mar \ parent \ on: 4_F4ll_GuY_0x01.md mostly_harmless
Yes, I was just talking about that. So, have you written more but are just holding back, or is that dramatic spot where you stopped?
I found the whole ambulance/EMS thing disturbing because of a crazy, tragic, event that just happened to people I know.
I found the whole ambulance/EMS thing disturbing because of a crazy, tragic, event that just happened to people I know.
I wanted to reply to this, too, but I got lost in my search to find the comment or post were you mentioned a burial. I thought I read it somewhere here but I can't find it.1
What I wanted to say is that I am not sure if what I experienced is what generally happens. If I would have to guess, I would say that a NDE is just a reflection of your whole life. As if your brain is feeling extreme FOMO and wants to resolve everything before shutting down for good but at the same time realizes that it's too late. You can't say sorry, thank you or fuck you to all these people that you met in all these years. They will never know how much they hurt you or how much they meant to you because you were too ignorant of life and death. And your brain goes into full denial mode because it can't accept that this is it while simultaneously realizing that this might indeed be it and it's in full denial mode. Or should I say the ego?
Anyway, if the people you knew lived a good life, I think you shouldn't worry. That's all that matters.
I think that's also what @DarthCoin meant with this comment. Live your best life but be mindful of death. I wasn't until that day. Still took me until just a few months ago to fully realize how much time I wasted already since I still didn't get it. I probably still don't get it but I'm trying now at least.
Footnotes
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almost got lost again ↩
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Strange timing. I was just writing about this incident in a reply to the latest stoic book club post. Obviously you lived it. I didn't. This happened to a close friend. The closest I have come was a heart attack about 10 years ago, but I never reached the point where I believed I would die.
My friend's daughter had asthma. She was a 35 year old mother to a one year old son. She had an attack at the family front door. She lived with my friend. Her death was bad enough, but a ring doorbell video camera caught the entire incident. The EMS responder says "I don't know what to do" and they never gave her oxygen. They just watched her die. It's bad enough losing a child, but seeing with your own eyes that she could have been saved was devastating.
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The EMS responder says "I don't know what to do" and they never give her oxygen. They just watched her die. It's bad enough losing a child, but seeing with your own eyes that she could have been saved was devastating.
Wow, I'm very sorry to hear that. I got immediate flashbacks to my paramedic training and that priority 1 is heartbeat and priority 2 is free airways for breathing. That they wouldn't know to give oxygen (like that's basically why you even do CPR, to circulate blood and the oxygen in it) is shocking.
What did they even do then? Literally nothing?
But it's also easy to blame EMS. They should know but it's also stressful for them. Still, I can't believe it but obviously I should.
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Her younger sister was with her. She told them she has asthma and to please give her oxygen. A different EMS crew had responded to a similar situation when she was pregnant. They got the oxygen to her immediately and it was fine. I think this EMS guy was young, inexperienced, and scared. At least he seemed to care. There was a cop on the scene who just stood there looking bored. Really my take is that it would be easier for the family to accept if it was not filmed by the ring camera. My friend keeps watching it over and over. Technology can be a curse.
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Oh @siggy47 - this is just awful. My heart goes out to her son. So many questions will remain. I don’t know how her family can get through other than to acknowledge that grief and loss is a process and everyone walks their own path through it. Long, painful days ahead for all affected.
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I would say that a NDE is just a reflection of your whole life.
Yes, the first part of NDE is that. But it happen in fractions of seconds (in our human body life time). In your mind it could take longer, depending on how many important aspects had you human body life.
But after that come more crazy stuff, you start seeing stuff that you never imagine you could see. It's your mind struggle, trying to find a path somewhere. This is the part where you shit your pants. THE UNKNOWN.
You are right, is meaningless to say sorry or fuck you... you are going to another dimension where all that is meaningless. Also for the people you left here on this fucking planet, it doesn't matter. After they put your body under the dirt, they will forgot you and also can't do shit about it.
OK I should STFU and not talking again about this. I only saw that you had the same instincts with that experience. Is fascinating, because I thought I was the only one crazy here :)
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But after that come more crazy stuff, you start seeing stuff that you never imagine you could see. It's your mind struggle, trying to find a path somewhere. This is the part where you shit your pants. THE UNKNOWN.
Mhh, I guess I wasn't that close to dying so this didn't happen for me. But the fear of the unknown is definitely a strong fear (see H.P. Lovecraft).
OK I should STFU and not talking again about this
Why not? Too scary?
because I thought I was the only one crazy here :)
lol I feel honored
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Will be scary (in human terms) for people reading it. For me is not anymore. I've been there 3 times and start getting used to. Also I saw the true meaning of life so for me is not scary anymore. For others could be.
Is not good to dug deep into this stuff because it could put you in a slippery slope, going down into the darkest parts of your mind. And is not a pleasant experience. Also you could never came back from that hole and your brain can be damaged forever.
Keep a balance and a strong mind.
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Also you could never came back from that hole and your brain can be damaged forever.
You sure that didn't happen to you? lol sorry, that was too good of an opportunity even though it's a serious topic. Guess I simply don't have anything to add and can only appreciate you sharing these words with us.
My brain just immediately uses humor as defense against dark stuff I guess.
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Humor is good. Is how you can keep a normal life.
Why do you think I post so many memes? To not think about that dark side...
Keeping the balance.
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So, have you written more but are just holding back, or is that dramatic spot where you stopped?
No, this is all I have written down so yes, this is where I stopped. But I already knew how I want to end this part of my origin story when I started writing it. It's just a matter of writing it down and deciding which details I want to keep, which to remove and which to change for various reasons like privacy or "artistic style".
I am in a different mindset now though. So not sure if I can keep up the same angry writing style. But my memories of what pissed me off in the hospital (and what was very charming) are decent enough so it shouldn't be too hard to pull it off. Might not be that important though. It's clear that I have written both parts at different points in time.
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